Corporate Jesus

The Jesus America Worships/America's Jesus

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

The Felines Respond

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Thursday, February 22, 2007

Why Save the Constitution?
One more thing...

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Money Trumps, eh, Peace Sometimes

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Thursday, February 08, 2007

Proposed Additions to the Lexicon

Since the turn of the century and the "everything-has-changed" moment shortly thereafter our language has increasingly been evolving, yet even with the addition of new words like "Bradgelina" and "iPod" there is room to grow. The following are some proposed additions and re-definitions I've been mulling over.

Baby Boober - 1. An American that cannot comprehend anything that isn't on television. 2. An American that believes everything he or she sees on television. "If it isn't on television the baby boobers won't believe it exists."

Bush-mire (also Bush-mare) - 1. A situation in which a country is held hostage by it's incompetent leader. 2. The time during the day in which George W. Bush is awake and allowed to move around and speak. "I thought we voiced our opinion when we voted, but nothing has changed, this is a Bush-mire." "This administration is a perpetual waking Bush-mare."

Bush-olution - 1. The wasting of resources and lives for a failed policy based on faulty idealogical dogma. "The Bush-olution is to keep on digging."

Bush-steria - 1. A mental state in which factual reality has no effect. 2. A delusional mental state in which a person or group of persons believe George W. Bush is good for America. "28% of the population still suffers from Bush-steria."

CEOligarchy - 1. The new aristocratic ruling class currently being formed by the further stratification of wealth. "The CEOligarchy does not exist, here's a 30 million dollar bonus to keep quiet."

Christianity - 1. A religion that professes to follow the teachings of Jesus, but really worships money and cruelty. 2. A group of intellectually dishonest deniers of physical reality and science. "I wouldn't say that every adherent to Christianity is an intellectually dishonest hypocrite, but then I've never met one that wasn't."

Condi-liar - 1. A bold faced liar. 2. Someone who lies to the entire world without remorse. 3. Someone who goes to a Broadway show and then shopping for shoes while New Orleans drowns. "Why shucks that Ann Coulter is a real Condi-liar."

Conformitastic - 1. The process by which Americans conform to what they see on television. 2. The joy of conforming to the whims of the ruling class and authority figures, especially when television is involved. "That episode of '24' was conformitastic, now I see that torture is really a good thing for our nation."

Dumb-ocracy (also dumbshit-ocracy) - 1. A system of governance where the ignorant rule. "Connecticut re-elected Joe Lieberman to the Senate again, Connecticut sure is a dumb-ocracy." "Only a complete dumbshit-ocracy would elect Sam Brownback to the Senate."

Free-dumb - 1. A system by which a population believes it is free, but is really enslaved. 2. The enslavement of people through ignorance. 3. The enslavement of peoples in far away foreign lands through mandated debt and natural resource theft, supported by a willfully ignorant citizenry that cares only to entertain itself with the consumption of corporately packaged karaoke contest winners. "God told me that we must spread free-dumb around the world."

Republican - 1. A politician that is in the employ of multi-national corporations. 2. A Christian Fascist. 3. A thief that uses the government to steal money, resources, and land. 4. The son of a thief that uses the government to steal money, resources, and land. "Jesus blessed me with riches that I inherited from my father, and that's why I know he wants me to be a Republican."

Republicunt - 1. Joe Lieberman. "Lieberman says he's an independent, but he's really just a lying Republicunt."

Secretitis - 1. The belief in a self-perpetuating con. 2. The belief that if you wish for something hard enough it'll come true. 3. The belief that the rich and wealthy know the secret of life. 4. The belief that those who are poor deserve to be poor because they didn't send out the right energy to the universe. "Even Oprah has secretitis, but then anything that appeals to her belief that she has a special connection with the universe appeals to her."

Trump-alicious - 1. A mediocre product that has been marketed as outstanding. 2. A poorly made product that has been over-hyped. 3. Anything that is all flash and no substance. 4. Total crap. "That sermon at the mega church was trump-alicious, I didn't know Jesus wanted me to be rich."

United States of Stupidity - 1. The segment of the American populace that votes against its own interests. 2. All red states. 3. People who believe what they see on Fox news. 4. A place full of ignorant people who are selling their children's future to multi-national corporations. "I went to South Carolina last year, I swear its the United States of Stupidity down there, by the way have you seen 'the Secret'? It's playing at my church tonight."

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