New Army Desert Uniforms!!

The new red coats are awesome!!

"The Surge"- Artist's rendition of the new Army uniforms for the ongoing occupation of Bagdad.

Top 10 things to say to your children before you have to sell them to the Chinese as slaves to settle your debt.

1. Hey can you pass me the TV remote on your way out.
2. It's the energy you're sending out into the universe that forced me to do this.
3. Long Live King George!
4. If I win the Lotto I swear I'll try to buy you back.
5. You could've joined the Marines if you weren't such a p*ssy, I would've but I've got flatfeet.
6. Jesus will reward you in heaven...if you're a good slave.
7. Do you have $40 so I can pay Juan for mowing the lawn this week?
8. Remember it's "gong hay faht choy".
9. Are you sure the Chinese slang for a Caucasian is "white devil"?
10. Unfortunately you didn't win immunity this week and someone has to go. Don't hate the players...

You ever wonder why ole' yeller, er I mean, Andy Rooney is still on TV?