Lou Schiffer is Evil
Weeks ago Corporate Jesus was approached by agents of Lou Schiffer who attempted to blackmail and extort monies from the beloved Corporate Saviour. These agents offered to sell these uncertified and unauthenticated images to Corporate Jesus for $4M. When Corporate Jesus refused to meet their demands they threatened to publicize the images over the internet and then asked for a total of $8M to keep the story quiet and turn over the images.
Because of Corporate Jesus' high moral standards he knew that the only correct course of action required his admitting this singular transgression and asking his Father for forgiveness. These images are uncertified, unauthenticated, and have been obviously doctored and therefore cannot be trusted.
Corporate Jesus has repented in his heart and has been forgiven by his Father. Please conduct all business as usual.
Check out the iPlant? Link Here!!
Get Corporate Forgiveness Here!!
Get Individual Forgiveness Here!!
*Riches currently only for Corporations
posted by Corporate Jesus @ 7:59 PM
2 Comments:
Jesus has little to do with us corps, other than giving an imaginary sense of entitlement and "forgiveness" for the wonton actions of Christians. They're such obediant subjects...
Soon though, our solution will be revealed. Your quaint cartoons serve little actual substance to your cause.
Jesus has little to do with corporate, other than the fact that Christians believe he will forgive them for their greed, and provide them entitlement for their actions.
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